Wednesday, August 19, 2009

One year ago today

:: Rein woke up in the wee hours, moments after his little sister was born ::

`

On July 19, 2008, little miss Gesina was born and we were entrusted with a little daughter to love and cherish. She was born at home (first home birth) and it was truly a blessed time! At day three the midwife came and noticed a heart murmur. Day five; she came again, and still there was a consistent murmur, so she called the pediatric cardiologist in London for an appointment to get it checked out the very same day. Usually heart murmurs should disappear within the first few days after birth, unless there is a problem. Gesina, however, did show very good vital signs, which would not be the case if there indeed was a serious heart problem. She had gained, if I recollect, 6 oz, between day 3 and day 5, so the immediate appointment was postponed till August 12~~ three weeks away. We kept a close eye on her and whenever there was a midwife in the area, they would drop in to have a listen. Her weight gain from then on stayed at the weight she was at day five, only growing an ounce or two. A few times she had a hard time drinking, or she'd turn pale, or she would get clammy (break out in a cold sweat) and have trouble breathing...but she would pick up shortly after that as if everything was normal. A few times I did call the office of the pediatric cardiologist to get in sooner, left messages, but my calls were not returned. This, I felt, was just God telling me that everything would turn out all right.

August 12 arrived; the day before my dear husband was to give one of his kidneys to his brother. I didn't think much of it other than having her little heart checked and to see what was the problem and going home from there.


Well, turns out her one heart valve was not opening and closing the way it should and there was a tremendous amount of pressure building up inside her heart because of it. Something needed to be done, and soon! Liz, the head nurse, gently showed me what Severe Aortic Valve Stenosis does to the heart and then proceeded to tell me I needed to take Gesina to Toronto Sick Kids Hospital the very next morning to undergo further assessment and have surgery done the day after. (they had already cancelled the appointed surgeries, to help Gesina first.)


I remember sitting there and telling Liz that I couldn't go because my husband was to undergo kidney donation the next day too! She turned pale, and then red, as she covered her mouth and ran out of the office to tell the doctor, but there was no question about it: Gesina needed to go, no matter what. They apologized over and over and I would have cried and cried if I had not remembered the few times that I had tried to call the office for a sooner appointment. It occurred to me that God had a plan with it all. What plan, I didn't know then and there, and I didn't need to know. It was simple ~yet hard~ for me to understand that God did have a plan with it all. He wanted me in Toronto with a sick little baby, three hours drive away from where my hubby was undergoing surgery. The day(s) we needed each other the most, God wanted us apart, and to rely fully on HIM!


My mind was a whirl, to say the least! I didn't have enough money for parking and when I asked a lady where the nearest bank machine was, she directed me to the third floor cafeteria and I must have looked quite pathetic because she handed me a five dollar bill. God did care for me, for us, so I scribbled her a hearty thank you note and stuck it under her window wipers.

On the way home I made a scattered trip to Wal-mart for some last minute items, and had to fight against starting to cry. I knew that once I started, I wouldn't be able to stop! But I needed to be strong for our children, for my dear hubby...

besides, God was in control and I truly believed that, so why would I cry? Even though how hard the trial was...



Bright and early the next morning I said goodbye to my dear hubby, my brother in law, my parents in law and they drove off into the stillness of the morning. I picked up a dear sister in law, who, even though she has trials to endure in her own life, had offered to come with me and I so, so appreciated it!


What they saw in London, was confirmed in Toronto. Gesina was definitely being admitted. The doctors there knew about what was going on with Gesina's daddy and when one Dr mentioned that the procedure they would perform surely couldn't wait another week, I dared to ask if it could possibly wait a few days, as my heart was with Pieter...

Poor man, he thought for a long moment, and then slowly gave us the go ahead to head home after pre-ops, and they would call the next day to tell us when to come back for the procedure. It was scary, risky, but I was oh-so-glad I could go and see my dearly beloved! When I finally made it to his bedside at 10:30 pm, the nurse soon told me to go home because they did not allow 'night visitors.' I told her the story, she was sorry, but I needed to go, anyways.

I went home with Gesina and had a good sleep, after all!


Kidney surgery went well and TRULY worth it all!



Visiting daddy in the hospital
The next day we got the call to come back to Sick Kids on Tuesday, five days later, August 19, and we prayed that Gesina would be OK over the weekend and maybe..? perhaps..? Pieter would feel up to coming with???



He did! And took every opportunity to lay down...


...or sit and try to sleep...


until they gave him a comfy bed and he slept a good deal!

The procedure they performed was done by inserting a catheter through her groin. Not surgery, where they open the chest cavity, but a Procedure to go in with the catheter, tear open the valve with hopes the blood flow would freely pump through her little heart. The result of this procedure is a leaking heart, with is basically blood leaking back into the collecting chamber, but that would be better than a valve that only allows 1/3 of the blood to flow through. Glory be to God, at the last checkup, there was NO leaking. This means that if the valve would ever grow closed, they can use the same, less invasive method!

All she had was a few small incision in her groin.


So, today, August 19, I look back once again and thank God for His Manifold blessings! Gesina is a spunky girl and her quality of life has improved so much because of it! She is small, but she is also a girl. She is tough, like any girl would be with four older brothers! She has regular checkups, and tomorrow I need to take her in again. They do an echo and an ECG test to see how the valve is doing. I am obviously sensitive to her and have noticed cold sweats lately, and occasionally she will lay her head down on her highchair table, but other than that she is spunky and full of life.





We look back, and thank God for the trial He sent us, for we have learned alot and have grown through it. God is there, always. I remember wanting to hold and hold and hold Gesina before the nurse came to pick her up for the procedure. I wanted that moment to last, but the thought came to me that she is just as much in God's Hands when she is my care, as she is in God's Hands when she is under the Dr's care. That blesses my heart!

~~~

... we have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the excellency of the power may be of God, and not of us. We [were] troubled on every side, yet not distressed; we [were] perplexed, but not in despair;

2Co 4:78


2 comments:

  1. lieve Bou,
    Ik word stil van je verhaal...
    dit versje kwam even in mij op en wou
    het met je delen.

    k'Stel mijn vertrouwen op de Heer,mijn God,
    want in zijn hand ligt heel mijn levenslot.
    Ik heb Hem lief, Zijn vrede woont in mij,
    k'zie naar hem op en weet:Hij is mij steeds
    nabij.

    love Grie

    ReplyDelete
  2. Aw, thanks Grie! That verse is a 'keeper'! How does the tune go?

    Liefs, Bou

    ReplyDelete

Always appreciate your kind words!